I find myself on my knees praying to my Lord every day. Not because I have to. Not because Im scared what will happen if I do not. Not because of what I get out of it. But, because I feel that when I am in prayer I am talking to my best friend. The person who knows everything about me. I can sit there, think and say nothing, but my feelings and deepest thought are being heard. I cannot imagine a greater feeling. I love feeling important...I mean, doesnt everyone? Its one of the most preciouos feelings in the world. Knowing that someone loves and cares for you, just becauses you are you. I dont have to be a certain person, do certain things, or say certain things for God to love me. He just does. And that is so comforting. I havev prayed so many prayers....prayers of sadness, prayers of joy, prayers of thanks, prayers of anger, and prayers of desperation. And they are all heard. Many people give up on prayer because they do not get what they prayed for. I believe we all have our share of "disappointing prayers". I believe one of the greatest prayers are those of children. When I was nine years old I said so many prayers in the waiting room of Memorial Hermann Hospital, that my Poppa wouldnt die of his second stroke. I prayed that the cancer wouldn't take Belinda Smith away from our church. I prayed that my best friend's family could stay with her in Houston for her senior year. I prayed tha God wouldn't take Karla when I felt like I needed her the most. Those, obviously are what I see my most disappointing prayers being. But, I also have prayed very rewarding prayers. I prayed that my best friend could stay in Houston her senior year, I prayed for Carol Wilson and her cancer, I prayed for complications in marriages, I prayed for sick babies, and most of all...I prayed for strength through all the "unanswered prayers".

I find that my most recent prayer has been answered. And in a different way than I had expected. I prayed for God to lead me where He wants me this summer. I prayed at first, for Kansas. So I could be with my best friend for the summer, so I could intern at my "Little brother and sister's" youth group, so that I could be comfortable when I was, "doing what God wanted me to do." But, I now know that I was praying for the wrong thing. I wasent praying for God to place me where He wanted me. I wqas asking God to change His plans for me by putting me where I wanted to be---and it just conveniently was where I would be the most comfortable. Well, I definitely got a huge stop sign on that. When I knew that I didn't get that job, I started earnestly praying for what my Lord REALLY wanted me to do. I went to Oregon to visit Karla and I got my answer. It was a blessing in itself that I even got to Oregon for Spring Break. It is a long way away and my first time to go that far by myself. But, as I continued to pray for God to lead me where I was needed (by the way---planes are an EXCELLENT place to pray). Turns out, PUMP was looking for interns. I love kids, i seem to be good with them, and most of them like me.

Now, this is definitely not where I will feel most comfortable. I know this. I will be living with the greatest people in the world, yes. But I will not know the kids. I do not know the city...heck, I dont even know the state. Things are definitely different up there (YOU CANT EVEN PUMP YOUR OWN GAS!!!). My best friend won't be any where near me. My momma and daddy will be 2,375 miles away. But....I have never felt God tug on my heart strings harder. This is where He wants me. I am going. I am being called. I will bring and show God's love to these children. I now cannot imagine better way to spend my summers.

I am very very nervous. But, knowing that God and the staff and Karla and Kerry< :) > are behind me make me feel that this is right. And that is all I need to know.

So, my GREATEST blessing is knowing that I have a Savior that will lead me where I need to go and will not let my own selfishness/wants get in the way of His purpose in my life. That is a GREAT blessing....

Hi Sarah,

I didn't really get to meet you the Sunday that you were at PUMP, but I wanted to say that I know you will be blessed through your internship this summer! I know that God has taught me so much through the time I have spent there this year. Hopefully I'll get to meet you this summer. My youth group wants me to come to PSP with them as a VBS group leader. I'm really encouraged by the things you have posted on your blog.

Jessica