I sit here..with my school life, my school schedule, my school friends, my school apartment...and I miss it.

Sometimes I feel bad, because I don't miss it as often as I missed it last year. But when I do, it is a fierce force that comes over me. I mostly feel it creep in late at night when I can't get to sleep...

I looked at how I have changed since I have been in Abilene. I still have the same morals and I still have the same personality. The same things make me laugh and the same things make me cry. I have become a quiet person here. A person who is focused on what needs to be done to get where I want to go.I have fun with friends here, still...but, most of the time I feel like there is something more purposeful here...and I have started concentrating more on school during the weeks instead of going to parties or doing nothing. I guess, I am a person who is growing up and becoming an adult.

It amazes me how I miss the most simple things. I miss holding Trinity in my lap at every opportunity and I miss the worship at PUMP (Oh Gosh...how I miss it). I miss just going to Cheronn's house and not doing anything...just sitting on the couch and watching TV, I miss knowing she was right down the street...just in case---and knowing that she would have open arms. I miss the small escapes I took at the White's house...and how I miss all five of them. Even though I didn't in any way encourage it, I miss Sai's little taps on my back side...because it let me know that he felt comfortable around me. I miss the sight of a mountain off in the distance, behind the haze. And gosh, oh gosh...how I miss those waterfalls.

The things that I remember at all times are the lessons and other things I took away from PUMP. There were so many that I have learned over the past almost two years.
1. There are more and different people outside my bubble---and those are the ones that I need to reach out to the most.
2. Expect friendship from the unexpected. I got one of my two best friends that way :)
3. Someone is always watching me. Most of the time, I probably don't even know it, but they are...and little eyes are precious and take everything in.
4. There are some places that feel just like home. And PUMP will always be one of them.
5. People care...when you think they don't--they will probably surprise you.
6. The world is NOT about me. The world is about how we can help each other out.
7. I learned, that in fact, I am not too young to be viewed as a mentor. And even if it scares me to death---I could be a huge factor in some of those kids' lives..and I need to be a good one.
8. I think I have found my calling through PUMP. Inner city ministries and education is something I long for after graduation. Hopefully, in Portland...but if not, I will go where ever God leads me.
9. God loves me, Jesus died for me, and I can have hope in the resurrection!



SO even though I do not long for PUMP as much as I did when I left last year, I carry the lessons I learned and the friends I gained in my heart daily.

Thank you, PUMP...for your lasting legacy on my life. Hopefully, there will be more to come!